冬眠的倉庫

Sam used to pray. He used to beg for forgiveness, because he is a sinner, because he did not save Jess, because he is weak.

Now the only name he says in his prayer is Dean. Between the light kisses on each and every one of Dean's freckles on the back.

Dean, Dean, Dean, Dean, Dean.

It sounds like redemption to him.

***


He likes to read when they are holed up in Bobby's place. Bobby really expanded his collection after he showed him the Campbell library.

"Sam?"

Dean gets concerned when he spends too much time on a particular page. It sort of happens a lot. But it is not like there's a wall there for him to scratch anymore. He's just...distracted.

"...Yea?"

"Move your lazy ass and help Bobby carry the salt, would you?"

And Dean says he is the bossy one.

***

You re-live your favorite memories in heaven. They learned that knowledge first hand.

Hell is a different story. Hell is all bones, and blood, and flesh, and pain. It's surprisingly physical. But it can be psychological, too. It can be your worst nightmares on replay. Hell is seeing Dean throw the amulet in the trashcan, again and again and again and again. He also learned that first hand.

He wonders if Dean's hell involves the night he left for Standford. He wouldn't be surprised if it does.

Because they are Sam and Dean Winchester. That's what they are to each other.

***

He tries to be provocative.

Stealing the first shower and making floor of the guest bathroom wet before Dean even wakes up, forgetting Dean's pie when its his turn to do food shopping, blocking computer access to porn sites, accidentally buying rose scented lube for replacement.

Dean mutters "you little..." "Bit..." under his breaths every time he realizes he has been had (hehe), but never confronted him. Dean still thinks he is fragile, like some kind of China.

Dean doesn't even break when an old lady in the drug store commented on how wonderful the young man next to her smells.

He just has to try harder.

***

Dean fixes things.

He fixed Sam's first mash mellow gun when he was six. He fixed all the furniture in the shitty apartments they stayed at. He fixed the tiny bends of the knife handles, the impala after it was ambushed by the demon truck, and Bobby's roof.

He wonders if he is too much of a lost cause for Dean to fix. He doesn't mind being Dean's little side project though, he has seen how much effort Dean spent putting the Impala back together. It gives Dean a sense of purpose when he tends to his baby.

It gives him a sense of purpose, too.

***

He was tackled from behind as soon as he steps into the room.

"You are going down!" Dean proclaims. He struggles and fights back, because he is Sam Winchester, and he does not give up easily.

The two of them end up lying on the floor, breathing fast for air. Dean moves his right leg and drops it on his stomach. The bed is kind of wrecked, the bookshelf is...not holding the books anymore. The room is a mess.

"Truce?"

"I don't know, maybe after you wake up with a brand new haircut."

He smiles. Sounds good.

***

Bobby takes a look at the room and they get kicked out.

"You two ijits don't come back until there are no shifters in North America. You hear me?"

"Yes, Sir"
"Thanks Bobby"

Hunting with Dean on the road. He can deal with that.